I think I have been dethroned, and could someone peel these tattoos off?

I thought I wanted to be the only female in my household. I thought I wanted only boys so I could keep my title as the princess of the house.

Every year on my birthday for as long as I can remember I have been wearing a tiara or crown. It was obnoxious, but I owned it. I took pride in the fact that everyone would notice me and have to acknowledge that it was my birthday.

During my bachelorette party, I took the opportunity to rock the crown as well. Any celebration would do, really.

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Yes. This is me, and yes, apparently I make this face.

However, on August 24th, 2018, I was dethroned. My very own princess, Noelle Joanne.

I thought I wanted another boy. I could keep being loved and adored by all the boys in my house and I’d be the only girl. I didn’t think I wanted to raise a girl. I was afraid of all the things I would do wrong as a parent. Why didn’t this worry me with my son? I just knew he’d always be Mommy’s boy and it was my husband’s responsibility to do all the “manly” teachings, but this was a GIRL. It would be MY responsibility to teach her about being a female, a girl, a teenager and a woman! How the heck do I do that?!?

I had my ears pinned back when I was 12 years old. They stuck out and I came home crying one day because a boy in my class called me “Dumbo”. My mom asked me if my ears really bothered me and took me to a plastic surgeon. We decided to go ahead and get them pinned back, a simple procedure, but a painful one.

My mother thought she was doing the right thing and helping me feel more comfortable in my own skin.

I wish I never had that surgery.

Noelle’s ears stick out a bit just like mine and I wish we still had that in common.

All of a sudden I don’t want to highlight my hair anymore!

I want to peel these freakin’ tattoos off!

I wish I never had a breast augmentation when I was 25 or got a belly button ring (who decided that was cute?!) because now I have this tiny hole that will never completely close!

When Noelle was born, I instantly knew she was perfect, just the way she was, and the older she gets, day by day, she proves that to me.

She is absolutely perfect.

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I want to match her in every way! I want to be the picture of perfection in her mind, not because I am perfect, but because God made me just right and he did the same for her.

How scary it is being the mother of a daughter!!

I don’t want to be a cautionary tale. I don’t want to be the version of what “not to do”.

If I wish my mom did one thing differently, it would be to insist that I was perfect just the way I was.

She told me not to get a tattoo, but I did, I got several.

What I hope to do differently is EXPLAIN why Noelle should or shouldn’t do something. The generation of “because I sad so” is so old fashioned and really inconsiderate.

I’m not saying tattoos are bad (please don’t let me offend you) or that getting a piercing is marring your body, but I want my daughter to know that her body is sacred and perfect. I want her to have the utmost respect for herself (and her body) and know that she has no flaws. She is exactly as she should be.

I know my children will one day tell someone who will listen that their mother did X, Y and Z wrong. They’ll inevitably have their own complaints and opinions about how we raised them. I just hope and pray they do it without any tattoos! 😉

So, not only have I been blessed (and humbled) to become the mother of a daughter, but I get to have NOELLE as my daughter!

I certainly don’t have all the answers to raising a little girl, but I hope she’s patient with me as I try to figure it out. I think she will be, she seems pretty nice.

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