I thought I wanted to be the only female in my household. I thought I wanted only boys so I could keep my title as the princess of the house.
Every year on my birthday for as long as I can remember I have been wearing a tiara or crown. It was obnoxious, but I owned it. I took pride in the fact that everyone would notice me and have to acknowledge that it was my birthday.
During my bachelorette party, I took the opportunity to rock the crown as well. Any celebration would do, really.
Yes. This is me, and yes, apparently I make this face.
However, on August 24th, 2018, I was dethroned. My very own princess, Noelle Joanne.
I had my ears pinned back when I was 12 years old. They stuck out and I came home crying one day because a boy in my class called me “Dumbo”. My mom asked me if my ears really bothered me and took me to a plastic surgeon. We decided to go ahead and get them pinned back, a simple procedure, but a painful one.
My mother thought she was doing the right thing and helping me feel more comfortable in my own skin.
I wish I never had that surgery.
Noelle’s ears stick out a bit just like mine and I wish we still had that in common.
All of a sudden I don’t want to highlight my hair anymore!
I want to peel these freakin’ tattoos off!
I wish I never had a breast augmentation when I was 25 or got a belly button ring (who decided that was cute?!) because now I have this tiny hole that will never completely close!
When Noelle was born, I instantly knew she was perfect, just the way she was, and the older she gets, day by day, she proves that to me.
She is absolutely perfect.
I want to match her in every way! I want to be the picture of perfection in her mind, not because I am perfect, but because God made me just right and he did the same for her.
How scary it is being the mother of a daughter!!
I don’t want to be a cautionary tale. I don’t want to be the version of what “not to do”.
If I wish my mom did one thing differently, it would be to insist that I was perfect just the way I was.
She told me not to get a tattoo, but I did, I got several.
What I hope to do differently is EXPLAIN why Noelle should or shouldn’t do something. The generation of “because I sad so” is so old fashioned and really inconsiderate.
I’m not saying tattoos are bad (please don’t let me offend you) or that getting a piercing is marring your body, but I want my daughter to know that her body is sacred and perfect. I want her to have the utmost respect for herself (and her body) and know that she has no flaws. She is exactly as she should be.
I know my children will one day tell someone who will listen that their mother did X, Y and Z wrong. They’ll inevitably have their own complaints and opinions about how we raised them. I just hope and pray they do it without any tattoos! 😉
So, not only have I been blessed (and humbled) to become the mother of a daughter, but I get to have NOELLE as my daughter!